Things to Remember. Things to Forget.

When Aria was born, she was in the NICU for about a week and half.  I was told that the reason she was there was my fault.  Even though I knew they were wrong, and they were treating her for something she did not have, I was racked with guilt.  If I could go back and talk to myself then, I would tell myself about tonight.  My dear little one has a bit of a bug.  Nothing serious.  She'll probably be fine by tomorrow.  But tonight she wants me to sit and hold her.  So I sat in the rocking chair in her room and held her.  I recited Bible verses, told her stories, and sang songs to her.  The cat joined us for awhile (where does anyone sit when I'm not here?!) and we petted her - as if we had a choice.  I would tell myself all of this and add - I don't remember the names of any of the nurses or doctors that treated Aria in the NICU.  Not that they didn't do a fine job, but they were wrong in their diagnoses, and in their wrongness they judged me.  It doesn't matter now.  It didn't matter then.  Here I am more than two years later with a wonderful, sweet, overall healthy little girl.  Today when Derek came in from work she squealed "Dad-deeee!"  Earlier today she laughed and said, "Noah funny!" "Noah funny!"  This was our day today, and that time in the hospital is almost completely forgotten.  Whenever you are in the middle of something hard, something that seems never ending, something unbearable, just remember in two years (or less) it was will be memory.  Although it seems unending, you will be surprised how quickly it's the distant past.  Then one day when things are lovely and good, you will think back on this time and it will seem so small.  Take the strength from it and leave the rest.  This too will pass and things will be so good you will want to drink up every small detail.  God is good to me.  God was good then, and God is good now.  That never changes.  Praise God.

A Christmas Favor

A lot of people seek to do something charitable this time of year.  They donate to a worthy charity.  Some deliver a meal to friends or family.   Some years you just don't have any extra money to give or not enough to give to all those you would like.  You know what you can always give?  Encouragement. Kind words.  This week, out of no where, a friend of mine sent me an encouraging message.  I needed it.  I have left the tab open on my computer to re-read it, as I needed it even more a few days later.  I tear up every time I read it.  I have not responded because I cannot think of words to adequately express my appreciation.
So, if you are looking for a way to give back this Christmas, take a few minutes and tell someone how much you appreciate them.  Tell them that you've noticed their hard work or their kindness.  You don't have to look hard to find someone, but look a bit farther than you usually would and find someone you might otherwise overlook.  Along those lines, I would like to ask for help in showing my appreciation to the hardest working person I know.  My husband.  This Christmas season, if you know my husband, would you mind sending him a message (FB, email, snail mail) and tell him something you appreciate about him?  Unless you live in our house, you probably will never realize how hard he works to take care of me, our kids, our home and a full time (and then some) job.  He doesn't just clock into work and clock out again eight hours later.  He genuinely cares about his clients.  Buying or selling a house is one of the most stressful things you do in this life, and Derek chose his profession because he wants to help people through the stressful time.  It's not easy, but he's good at it.  He invests himself in his clients.  He does it while also being the primary care giver for our small children.  He does that on top of taking care of his chronically ill wife.  He prepares our meals.  He does the dishes.  He cleans the house.  He does the shopping, and anything else that needs to be done.  And he still manages to be a friend.  So, again, please send him a message of appreciation this Christmas.  It won't cost you anything (maybe a stamp if you use snail mail), but it will mean a lot to us.  Thank you, and Merry Christmas!

**I'm hiding this link from him so it will be a surprise.  Please keep the secret. 

Just an Ordinary Wednesday in November

I woke up with so much pain that it hurts to breathe.  While I'm sleeping better, I'm in more pain because of it.  It's been several days now that I just can't seem to get my feet under me.  So here's my reminder -  This pain I'm feeling has a purpose.  This pain is for my good and God's glory.  It's so easy to get discouraged, but if I'm looking at it correctly, it's not discouraging at all.  In fact, it is encouraging and even empowering.  God is doing something in my life.  God is working for my good and His glory.  If I look at this pain as a tool, I am free.  I'm free of the shackles of my own expectations.  I'm free of the burden of other people's expectations.  God is using me in a unique and special way.  All I need to do is get out of the way and let Him.